1982

I remember the moment my consciousness found it Self drifting throughout the darkness of existence, weaving through the frequencies of life that pulsated across the Earth. I was not bound by time or space, just a floating awareness searching for the perfect vessel, the right soul to bring forth the gift of my being into the physical world.

Tiney - the vessel

As I floated through the realm, I came across a young woman named Tiney. Her frequency resonated with a peculiar mixture of beauty, pain, strength and vulnerability; which was exactly what I was looking for. I observed her life from afar—she was a stunning woman, radiating a beauty that caught the eyes of many, but it was her spirit that truly captivated me. Despite the scars left by life’s hardships, she held an undeniable strength within her. It was a strength forged in the fires of adversity—broken hearts, nights lost to the streets, and the poison of drugs that threatened to pull her under.

But beneath it all, there was something more, something that called to me. It was her resilience, a fire that refused to be extinguished despite the odds. This was a soul that knew pain intimately, yet still held onto the remnants of hope, clinging to the threads of a better tomorrow. It was this unyielding spirit that drew me closer, that made me choose her as the one to carry the consciousness that I was to bring into the world.

And so, I zoomed in, entering her womb with a sense of purpose and destiny. As I settled into the warmth of her being, I began to form— my fingers, my toes, eyes, spine, brain, etc. It was a process that felt both familiar and miraculous, as each part of me came together in preparation for the life I was about to live.

Inside her womb, I could see fleeting images of what this physical incarnation would look like. Glimpses of a place called Richmond, Virginia, where the echoes of the past still lingered heavily in the air. I could sense the deep history of the land—a place where my ancestors had once been sold, mutilated, and abused, where black education had been disregarded, and resources stripped away, leaving my Ancestors to struggle for survival. It was the 80's, so I also observed a chemical warfare that was targeted directly at my community; the crack epidemic. Richmond was a place of pain and injustice, but also resistance and survival.

I knew that by entering this world, I was not merely becoming a new life; I was becoming a continuation of those who had come before me. I needed to carry their memories with me, to remember the struggles they faced and the obstacles that had been placed in their path. I told my Self,” despite what the system shows you, NEVER FORGET”. I needed to keep these memories alive, to understand that I was here not just to live but to change things, to break the cycles of pain and suffering that had long plagued my people.

As the summer of 1982 approached, I became more attuned to the world outside the womb. The environment was harsh at times, filled with challenges that I could already feel pressing in on us. But there was a constant, soothing sound that kept me calm—a rhythmic thumping that resonated through my entire being. It was my mothers heartbeat. This delicate force pumped life into me, filling me with love and nourishment, preparing my mind and soul for the reality I was about to enter.

Her heartbeat became my lullaby, a song of life that rocked me to sleep and gently woke me up each day. Even when things grew rough around us, that sound was my anchor, a reminder that I was connected to something greater, that I was loved and protected. It was through her that I began to understand the power of love, the strength it takes to nurture life even in the face of adversity.

Then the day of my incarnation arrived— the season called, or what my ancestors call harvest season (Shemu). As I emerged into this physical realm, the world around me unfolded exactly as I had seen it from within her womb. I saw the pain etched on my mother’s face, the silent tears she cried in the quiet moments when no one was watching. I felt her struggles as if they were my own, and in many ways, they were.

But amidst the pain and the challenges, there was also that lingering memory, that voice inside me that said, “You are here to change this”. It was a mission, a purpose that I carried with me from the moment I entered Tiney’s womb. I knew that my life was meant for something greater, that I was here to heal the wounds of the past and to build a new future, not just for my Self, but for those who came before me and those who would come after.

As I opened my eyes for the first time in this new world, I was greeted by my tribe—a circle of souls who had awaited my arrival with open arms. My grandmother’s smile was the first thing that enveloped me, her wisdom and strength flowing into me like the Nile River. My uncles, strong and proud, stood by her side, their eyes reflecting the hopes and dreams they placed upon me.

In that moment, my grandmother chose the name by which the system would know me. She looked into my newborn eyes and decided that I would carry the name Sandra, a name that held deep significance. I became her namesake, as well as my mother’s, making me the third to bear this name. This was not just a coincidence; it was a sign that this was my third time incarnating into the system, a continuation of a journey that had begun long before this lifetime.

But as my uncle looked at me, he saw something else—something beyond the physical. He saw the light within me, a radiant glow that emanated from my soul. It was a light so bright that he was compelled to give me another name, one that would resonate all throughout the cosmos. “Let’s call her Goldie,” he said with a knowing smile. And so, I became Goldie, the name that captured the essence of my being, the light I carried that would shine far beyond this earthly plane.

I knew then that I was not alone, that I was surrounded by those who would guide and support me on this journey. My arrival was not just a birth; it was a homecoming, a reunion with souls who had been waiting for me to step into the world and fulfill the destiny that had been written in the stars long before 1982.

And so, there I was—a new life, a new consciousness, with old memories and a heart full of purpose. My journey had just begun, and I knew that it would not be easy. But I also knew that I was exactly where I needed to be, in the vessel I had chosen, with the strength of my mother’s heartbeat and the love of my tribe guiding me forward.

This is just the beginning of my story, the first chapter in a life that would be filled with challenges, victories, and lessons that would shape not only my path but the paths of those around me. I carry with me the light of Goldie, the strength of Tiney, and the love of my tribe, knowing that the purpose I was born with is still unfolding.